Dealing with Pushy People

I'm really getting tired of dealing with pushy people. In this past week alone, I've been driven up the wall by people who cannot accept no for an answer.

I've been meaning to address this issue for a while because I know it's not just me who experiences it.

Here it is; out in the open: I do not respond well to peer pressure. It's this attitude that has gotten me this far. I don't like to be told what I *SHOULD* do or what I *SHOULD* try. Although I appreciate suggestions, I don't like to have things repeated to me a million times even after I say, "No" or I've politely made an excuse to make myself unavailable to the idea.

This week, I talked to my cousin who is getting married and told her that I was not going to attend her bachelorette party. First off, I cannot afford to spend half a thousand dollars for a weekend in Windsor because she has a sudden need for her family members to show up and get wasted with her. And secondly, I'll be driving down for her Bridal Shower already so she cannot complain. Instead of being grateful that I'm taking the 4-hour drive to Windsor to attend her Bridal shower, she got really upset and tried to pull the "I'm-so-disappointed" act on me and threw in the "Please-come-I-only-get-married-once" speech as well. When I adamantly said NO...she changed her tone and said, "Well, sorry you can't make it, it's going to be a GREAT time."

Then, I have a former co-worker who just doesn't understand the concept of a polite refusal. On numerous occasions, she has asked me to come over to her house, to go clubbing with her and even to go see a movie. I am not the type to jump at any chance to go out. In fact, I'm very much a home-body who likes to stay in. As I don't want to rudely come out and say, "I don't really want to hang out with you," I've been telling her the truth about how busy I really am. Instead of understanding and politely saying, "Oh okay, don't worry about it," she has the nerve to say to me, "Well, you can only use that excuse once."

It drives me up the wall. What is so hard to understand? If I invite someone out and they say no adamantly, I'll take a hint and leave the offer open. If they want to take it, they will. You can't FORCE people to be friends with you the same way you can't FORCE people to do whatever you want them to do.

Anybody who puts pressure on me to do anything will get a million no's. If you want me to hang out with you, give me the choice and don't make me feel bad about not doing what you want. When you take choice away from me, I will give you a NO even if I really wanted to go. It absolutely drives crazy!